Shame

Today was rough. Really rough. It started out well. I woke up, had my shake, then went to work. They were having a holiday party and I had a brilliant plan to only pick out one treat to have.

Before I knew it I had a full plate, and kept going back for more during the 3+ hours I was there. It's like that old fat person just came right back out and decided that stuffing my face was worth any consequences that it may have...

The rest of the day just spiraled down from there. I felt sick, depressed, and lost all motivation that I had for the day. I was ashamed. After all the hard work that I've done over the last year it's scary how quickly the old me can come back. The head games are real.

Sorry for the negative post but I am so sick of hearing how if you have weight loss surgery weight loss will be so easy and it will just fall right off. I've worked my butt off in the gym, refused my favorite foods countless times, and it's not like that is easy. I have the ability to stuff my face like today all the time. I CAN eat crap and I can eat plates full of it. If I give up today I could easily gain back all of the weight I've lost in the next few months.

It's days like this where I have to pick myself back up and start again tomorrow. I've come too far to give up.

Tomorrow is a new day.